I came across this song today thanks to Tom Allen who hosts Shift on CBC Radio 2. It pretty much sums things up. Thank Dumbo Feather for posting on YouTube. Thank you Hawksley Workman for your words and talent. Autumn's here.
I'm feeling rather ho-hum this evening despite having a great day in my garden completing my planters. Not sure why I feel a tad spiritless. So my remedy shall be some self-care in the form of working on a crossword puzzle and reading one of my all time favourite children's book by Holly Hobbie from the Toot and Puddle series called You Are My Sunshine. If you are familiar with this book then I'll say, "I feel too pink" and mope off this page.
What do you like to do when you feel ho- hum? I'm starting to prepare my next sewing project. Inspired by these pillows I saw at Target, I am on a hunt to find fun patterns and colours such as these. I'm having difficulty finding it locally and so I have been searching online. If anyone knows of some online fabric stores that ship to North America, let me know! I would like to make 16 X 16 inch pillows.
I'm a beginner when it comes to sewing. I love the challenge of learning new skills, creating something personal and it does feel great to see the work completed. Although, I do get a tad frustrated when it's just me trying to figure these things out. I definitely rely on youtube video and connecting with some of my co-workers who are avid stitchers. I have set aside Thursdays as my open craft night. If I am working on a sewing project, I have come to learn that I need to separate the steps between purchasing, preparing and sewing material. I have projects on hold that involve very long pieces of material (especially material with stretch) until I figure out the best way to measure and cut. So...I have been keeping my projects to smaller pieces so that I learn a few tricks before I get to longer pieces of material. And I have been keeping my projects to something that can be sewn in one night (that's sewing only) so that I feel successful about my efforts put into . Not to mention, I have also come to learn that I should only buy material I love! I always look at the price of the material and it determines whether I will buy it or not. The problem is that sometimes, the material I really love isn't on sale and so I buy something that "just does" for the time being. I find that my love for the project leaves me a little when I compromise on that. Most often, all the material goes on sale... so I need to remind myself to buy the stuff I love! By separating out the steps on different nights, the project feels new again and I feel enthusiastic about delving into the sewing. In fact, I often feel I want to get back to the project before my craft night comes around and I carve out time to do so! If during the time that I am working on my project I start to feel that my sewing is "laboured" than I give myself permission to stop. I found that if I push on while feeling negative about the project, that I don't do my best stitching. Regret ensues if I continue on that path. In fact, Krista from lazy - saturdays gives a great summary of learn to love sewing/ 7 simple tips . I have also come to the same conclusions in points 1, 2 , 3 and 4. I'm certainly filing points 5, 6, and 7 under advisement within my mental filing box! Inspired by:
1 part Famous Authors game sitting in my roll top desk 1 part artist Lea Redmond and her brother Devin from Leafcutter Designs with their social participatory art projects 1 whole Library I've decided to create a game. This is how it is played. To start, you need to read fictional/non fictional "work" (can be essay, poetry, novel, short story, etc.) by an "Author". The next read needs to be from an Author whose last name begins with the last letter of the previous Author. At the same time, mark the letters of the alphabet down. Cross off the letter of the alphabet of your Author's last initial. Try to work through and cross off each letter of the the entiralphabet. If a last name produces a letter you've already had then move to the next available letter on your alphabet list. The game ends when you've worked your way through the alphabet. Here's an example, the first Author I'm going to read an essay from is Isaac Asimov. This would lead to my next Author whose last name needs to begin with V. If I had already read an Author whose last name began with V then I would move on to W, if that letter was still available. Should make for some fun searches in the library, online as well as, interesting, varied reads. OK....let's begin. Feel free to start with your own Author or play along with me and start with Isaac. I'll comment as I read along. It's not a race. Take time to research, read and review the work you are about to read. I was listening to Brad Katsuyama on CBC radio. He stated something to the effect that we have more control of the outcome if we take a step towards making a change then if we sit back and hope that another person steps forward to make a change. If you want to hear someone with characteristics of a leader, I suggest listening to this interview. Starting this blog was me taking a step forward and making a change in my life. I'm not all too sure where this will all go. But it feels so good that I'm reaching for my dreams one post at a time. I think I was so afraid to start because I was afraid to fail. Sir Ken Robinson in a TED talk states, "if you we are not prepared to be wrong, then we'll never come up with something original". I've been frightened of being wrong/doing wrong with my creative adventures and that thought was putting up a barrier to me trying. I took part in an interview at the start of the week. I've been stewing on my answers all week. All I wanted to do was move forward (mentally) but my brain just kept sucking me in, replaying all the things I said and inserting things I should have added or different examples I should have talked about. Sometimes when I get stuck in thinking about the past and all those things I want to change, I tell myself to "stop" and sometimes I even just blurt out my cat's name to break up my thoughts. I know one of my strengths is that I am reflective but sometimes I want to take a break from that. Picture a rectangle drawn with dashes. I'm trying to push myself outside those dashes so that I can experience something new! Here's an excerpt of lyrics from City and Colour Sleeping Sickness song. And I'm afraid To sleep because of what haunts me Such as living with the uncertainty That I'll never find the words to say Which would completely explain Just how I'm breaking down ...I teeter between feeling the pain of the world as I see, hear and frighteningly imagine it and the world where everything is rosy and peachy...
and balloons holding dreams float in a sky that cradles them. I enjoying reading the blog of Angry Chicken. Thanks to one of her posts, I discovered the poem-a-day feature of poets.org. Every morning I receive a poem in my inbox. I open the email with bated breath hoping that some phrase will speak to me to unlock a mystery held within or release an emotion from chains or wow my brain for the way in which something is described so eloquently. From the poem, "I Got Heaven" by Garrett Hongo he writes,
"I swear that, in Gardena, on a moonlit suburban street, There are souls that twirl like kites lashed to the wrists of the living And spirits who tumble in a solemn limbo between 164th And the long river of stars to Amida's Paradise in the West" The souls tied to the wrists of the living resonated with me. I've been told I'm a bit of an "old soul". I find it interesting when someone else notices something about you that you don't self recognize. So it took me time to think about whether this matches who I am. I struggle between holding on to the past and the very nature of life where time always moves us forward. Perhaps I like to be tied to souls who want to dance along with me on the "long river of stars" (I love that description as it could mean so much - are they stars, are they strings of light in the sky that line streets). To me it's a path lit from both the natural and industrial world. seasons tarnish copper revealing luck My attempt at a Haiku to illustrate the joy of finding a penny! (We link finding pennies to my grandparents.) I'm afraid to be myself with people I'm getting to know. I feel so much more comfortable with people I hardly know. Why is that? Although I'm still living, it's like my spirit "tumbles in a solemn limbo". What would Freud or Jung say about this all? As I peruse some of their theories of personality I'm left with more questions: "did they base their theories on their own personality?, did they speculate about others based on their own knowledge, idiosyncrasies, vices and self reflection?". The greatest knowledge we have is based on what we as humans have produced, connected and collected. (and so I ponder. I guess this is the part of exhalation of the sunset I spoke about below.) ...the answer lies within...and is unique to me. Stacey, a co-worker, said this to me just the other day when she saw my hair. It struck me how lovely this comment was and from there symbolism bloomed. I've been contemplating creating a blog. It's nerve racking to say the least. While also a tad exhilarating with thoughts that my internal musings may be interesting to others; just as I have come to enjoy the voice of bloggers I have discovered, often by happenstance. Back to the symbolism. Sunset is the inhalation of a warmth that envelops the body, a wind kissed face, the feeling of hope and a sense of satisfaction from life all held in the mind for that moment the sun sets. It is also a sigh of sadness that the day is winding down and soon the culmination of the day will change and perhaps, people will leave; people will age, the environment will change and the day can never be re-created.
I want to document the "sunset" in my life with use of words/visuals/projects/songs/art/pictures/fortunes/purchases/thoughts/etc. to capture that inhalation of warmth. "hi". |